Tuesday, October 08, 2013

Being Thankful...


I was driving my kids to school this morning. At a red light, I looked back at my older one to say something and I felt some discomfort in my eye. I had never felt that before. The light turned green and we kept going. 

When I felt it again while in front of my computer later during the day, I resorted to our best (or not so best) friend google to see what it could be. Biggest mistake right? Ignorance is sometimes bliss. 

After reading all the scary stories and looking at horrific pictures, I was scared that I might loose my eyesight. Too quick to conclude? Probably the mind is programmed to believe bad over good. 

All of a sudden all these thoughts started coming to my mind as to how life would be if that happens. I wont be able to see my kids? No TV, No computer, No reading, No colors, No life? 

Within an hour and half after pleading with the scheduler, I was at the Ophthalmologist. With every letter I read on the board I felt I topped the class. With every test being cleared, gave me a sense of satisfaction that everything is alright. The doctor concluded that everything is fine and the pain is due to the inflammation and should go away. I breathe a sigh of relief. 

But wait, doctor, you dialated my pupil, I cannot see anything. How would I drive back home? 
You are fine driving it is just in the room that you cannot see for a couple of hours.

I came out with blurry vision. Saw 2 missed calls on my phone, but could not read who was the caller. Sent voice message to Sachin and he replied with a text. Could not read it. Came back home and tried to work on computer, could not. Thought of catching up with my DVRed shows. Could not. Finally I resorted to bed and closed my eyes. 

While I closed my eyes and got a moment to think, I thought about people who actually do not have eye sight or for some reason lost it. My heart was heavy, and I could feel their pain. I could feel a tear coming out of my dilated eyes.

As after a point, those thoughts started making me uncomfortable so I called some friends. By the time my phone calls ended I could see better. I thanked God for my vision and for everything I have. I realized that sometimes, being thankful is the most comforting thing you can do for yourself.


AmritaSinha said...

Hope you are doing fine now. Being thankful to god for wateva he gave us is the best we could do and he makes sure that we do it often.

Tanvi Sinha said...

For sure, when we keep running behind small things we do not have, we forget the big things we have in life.

Sachin Sinha said...

It is indeed scary. When we go through something like this we realize how blessed we are. I am glad that nothing came out of this. Wish you all the very best and love you the most.

Tanvi Sinha said...

Thanks a lot :) Very thankful for you being in my life and for such wonderful kids and supportive people around :)

Tanya Anurag said...

Pheewww... quite an experience! Hope the morning to come, greets you with clear visibility and a pain-free day.